04.15.02 // 10:24 p.m.
No, I am not a Tejano music star whose heart rhythmically beated �bidi bidi bom bom� each time her lover neared but was silenced by the bullets of a crazed woman. I am not Selena (though I do admire her talent).
No, I don�t have the ass and weak singing skills of Jennifer �J.Lo� Lopez.
No, I have not dyed my hair blonde and �crossed over� to the mainstream in skimpy clothes all while belly dancing as Shakira has done.
No, I don�t play some of the most admired women in Latin America, such as Minerva �Mariposa� Mirabal or Frida Kahlo like Selma Hayek.
No, I don�t kick ass on a television series a la Jessica Alba.
No, I�m not a stick-thin espa�ola who is mistaken as a �Latina� and dates Tom cruise. I am not Penelope Cruz.
No, I�ve never recorded �canciones de mi padre� en espa�ol even though I don�t speak the language. No soy Linda Ronstadt.
No, I don�t whine �Billeeee!� in White Men Can�t Jump like Rosie Perez.
No, I�ve never worn a headdress filled with bananas and other tropical fruit as Carmen Miranda once did.
No, I did not play the stereotypical Mexican spit-fire-sex-kitten in several Hollywood films. No, I am not Dolores del R�o (though I do love her name).
No, I don�t have big hair like Charo, otra espa�ola who is �latina.�
No, I am not a former MTV vee-jay and model. I am not Daisy Fuentes.
No, I do not sing Americanized forms of typical Cuban music produced by the Miami Sound Machine like Gloria Estefan (I really do like most of her music).
No, I am not a half-ecuatoriana, platinum blonde with horrifying makeup. I am not a genie in a bottle and don�t rub me the wrong way. No soy Christina Aguilera.
No, I do not sing �I like to leev een America�� on a rooftop as Rosita Moreno once did in West Side Story.
And, NO I am not the woman on the label of those awful canned beans, Rosarita.
I can�t stand the mainstream entertainment industry�s portrayal of Latinas. Either we are oversexed temptresses, powerless and uneducated women, or cholas pulling blades out of our hair. Rarely do I find a Chicana or a Latina in film, television or music I can actually relate to. They�re supposed to be representing me? No gracias.
The thing that bugs me most about this is that these mujeres help to fuel this recent �fetishization� (yes, I just made up a word) of Latin American women. Suddenly we�ve become a hot commodity, a valuable accessory on the arms of rappers, on the cover of Rolling Stone and at all awards shoes. Where would the entertainment industry be without the token Latina with her strong accent and ass shaking skills?
We�re exotic, tropical creatures that can be seen on Caliente moving to the beats of crappy music. Few see the Latina politicians, doctors, lawyers, teachers, entrepreneurs, activists, artists, musicians, students, etc.
We all don�t dance salsa. Some of us don�t speak Spanish. Some of us don�t have accents and are told how great our English is. Some of us can�t stand spicy food. Some of us are not devotees to la Virgen de Guadalupe. Some of us are lesbians. Some of us are teen mothers. Some of us are recent immigrants. Some of us are PhD�s. Some of us are high school dropouts. We are an incredibly diverse group, but you don�t really see that do you?
This whole fetish over Latinas really bugs me. I think I�m just on my Chicana feminist rant of the week.
[Note: inspired by a post a few weeks ago over at okayplayer.com about fetishes in which someone responded �Latinas who swallow.�]
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