Gustavo wrote in an email a couple days ago:

I have a question for you though. What's your motivation? What drives you in getting your doctorate? I am always curious to know what drives other chicano/latino students in higher education.

I had to think about the answer a little. Why am I putting myself through the lengthy, rigorous and potentially isolating process of earning a doctorate? What drives me?

This isn't the first time I've had to think about this. When I applied to schools last fall, I had to write about why I wanted a PhD or an MA (depending on which school I was applying to). Even though I'm fairly confident in my writing ability it was still difficult to express in coherent words why I wanted to be in a PhD program.

I tried to write it at the beginning and end of my personal statement:

Last few sentences of the first paragraph:
My personal experience as a first generation Chicana and student leader, combined with my academic background in Chicana/o Studies and Sociology, and my current work in the retention of underrepresented students serve as my primary sources of motivation to pursue a doctoral degree in the Higher Education and Organizational Change (HEOC) program from the UCLA Graduate School of Education and Information Studies. The doctoral degree will be an important part of my personal goal to become a professor and researcher in higher education. As a researcher, I hope to contribute to the body of research on higher education, the retention of underrepresented students, and the role of student leaders and activists in creating institutional change.

Last few sentences of my personal statement
. My background has informed my desire to pursue a career in higher education and work to improve higher education experiences for Chicana/o and Latina/o students as well as other underrepresented students of color. It is for these aforementioned reasons that I ask you to strongly consider my application for admission into the HEOC doctoral program.

While all those reasons are absolutely true, I think it was written partially for my audience and was devoid of the passion.

My reasons for doing this are, in ascending order:

• When you have those three little letters behind your name people listen to you and respect that you are an expert in your respective field.
• I'll need this degree to open doors to potential jobs down the road.
• I really love to learn and wanted to develop my research skills. I'm a nerd at heart and have always loved to be in school and around other students.
• I really love to work with students and have seen a great need for improvement in the retention rates of Chicana/o and Latina/o - as well as other underrepresented minority - students.
• My love for my people: Chicanas/os, Mexicanas/os, Latinas/os... Raza in general, especially the youth!
• A desire to not only "improve the odds for some kids" but to "[alter] the odds themselves" as Fr. Greg Boyle wrote recently. Basically, I know that after I get out of school I'll continue to work to change things on a grand level.
• The elders in my family. I know that my grandparents, parents, aunts and uncles all worked extremely hard to gain what they have today. I know they went through tough times and made sacrifices. I feel like if I didn't work to my potential I would be letting them down. My motivation from my elders in mi familia comes from immense love, respect and a desire to make them proud.
• My family in general. I want to be a motivation for the younger ones like Bibi (oldest cousin on my mom's side of the family and first to graduate from college) was for me. Bibi never pushed me one way or the other, but just attending her graduation at SDSU and seeing her artwork, talking to her and just generally thinking she was the coolest person in my family made me want to pursue college.
• The young women and girls, las Chicanitas, in my family. It's a gender thing, I know, but I know they all have immense potential and I want to be in a position to help them get where ever they want to go... or even just nudge them in the right direction. I see a lot of myself in them. Maybe it's selfish, but I just want them to realize their dreams.

The ones that inspire, motivate and keep me going:

My sister, Lori (21), and cousin, Christine (17)

My cousins Nancy (19) and Vanny (16)

My niece (cousin's daughter), Star (8)

My cousin and ahijada (god daughter), Valerie (9). She's also known as the Sunshine of my Life.

Me siento: happy
Escuchando: "pasa mountains" by quetzal

M�s reciente:
Searches - 09.16.05
the big move - 07.29.05
mother and daughter: a comparative analysis - 07.28.05
jardineros y dom�sticas - 07.27.05
tough question - 07.25.05

antes // despu�s