El c�rculo
04.03.02 // 11:07 p.m.

I know all the sayings. I know that what goes around comes around, everything comes full circle, and you should do unto others as you want others to do unto you (the Golden Rule). I learned the Ten Commandments in Catholic catechism classes at my local parish at a young age. Later, I learned the seven deadly sins and saw them gruesomely illustrated in the film Se7en. The point is I had a very good grasp on the concept of right and wrong, but still sometimes I chose not to follow it for whatever reason I had.

Last June I did something I never imagined myself doing. I won�t go into it, but the point is, it was not something a person of integrity would have done. I can�t even blame getting into the situation on being under the influence of alcohol and mota (pot) because once sober I did it again. The situation didn�t last too long, and I felt great remorse for my actions. I don�t know if I feel regret because the situation was also a growing and learning experience.

Since then I�ve been thinking of how what I did will come back to me. Will I be hurt in the way I hurt K (someone involved in the situation)? I had little regard for her feelings and I was very selfish. Will I be put in her shoes? I honestly hope not. I have a fatalistic attitude about it though, like it eventually will happen. Sometime in the future, I will feel the same terrible feelings K did. I already know what it was like to be J (another person involved in the situation). Sigh� I�m a smart girl who does some stupid shit.

[Note: I know I�m being incredibly vague, but with this particular situation I feel I should keep it like that. Many of the people close to me already know what I�m talking about, but there are some who don�t and for the time being, I�d like to keep it that way.]

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