I�ve never liked facing change. It�s just too much work, too much adjusting. Sometimes I don�t have a choice, I just have to suck it up and make the best of the situation.

Maybe I�ll cut my hair much more than the trim I�ve been planning on. I can do it after graduation, as a physical reminder of all the changes I�m experiencing in my life, the good, bad and just plain scary ones.

I�m still scared. I got a funny feeling in my tummy about what could happen between Dom and myself. I think I know what I want now, but I need to hear him too. If anything, I know that this has been an incredibly rewarding experience, and I have a much better understanding of the saying �amor de lejos, amor de pendejos.�

Graduation is just days away. It�s only a ceremony, but its all the things that come with it. The symbolic move into the real world, the realization that I�m no longer a student (formally).

I have to step up to the challenges of Calm�cac, and there are so many. People will be pulling at me from 4 different directions. Ha, how fitting. Four has always been a sacred number for people of native descent. I need to memorize the letter Henry wrote to me, because if anything, he�s going to hear my complaints later.

I�m no longer feeling weepy. I�m a little more clearheaded today, as if the 4 hours of sleep helped me out that much. I�m still scared. I wish I just could go hide behind in my parents� bed.

Me siento: scared
Escuchando: nothing, Vane is sleeping in the office

M�s reciente:
Searches - 09.16.05
the big move - 07.29.05
mother and daughter: a comparative analysis - 07.28.05
jardineros y dom�sticas - 07.27.05
tough question - 07.25.05

antes // despu�s