I applied for a position as a graduate student representative to a committee at UCLA. The students on these committees get stipends. Oh yeah, and the positions are pretty important.

I was sure I'd get one of the positions. You know, with my qualifications and the fact that I used to practically run the office (my old workplace).

So, when I got the email today saying that I WAS NOT going to be interviewed because the committee had a limited number of interview slots and there were more applicants I was MAD.

I really don't get it.

I've used more four-letter words today than most days. I want to pull the race card and make a huge fuss about how the graduate students association is not representative of graduate students of color.

That's the reactionary part of me. The more introspective part of me knows why this has hit my ego so hard.

It's simple. For the past 5 or so years, I've gotten everything I've applied or run for that I've really wanted. (Let's ignore the love life stuff). I got elected to every position I ran for in MEChA, on campus with the Ch�vez Center, and for student government. I got the scholarship from the Latino Alumni Association. I got the job I really wanted. I got into every graduate school I applied to. I haven't had to deal with rejection*.

I don't know how to deal with rejection or someone telling me I'm not good enough.

*Coming back to this, I realized I didn't get accepted to Teach for America, but I really didn't care.

Me siento: gross
Escuchando: the postal service "brand new colony"

M�s reciente:
Searches - 09.16.05
the big move - 07.29.05
mother and daughter: a comparative analysis - 07.28.05
jardineros y dom�sticas - 07.27.05
tough question - 07.25.05

antes // despu�s