I didn�t feel nervous yesterday. There were no butterflies in my stomach and no just-on-the-tip of nausea feeling. I just walked up to the counter and presented both priority envelope packets to the postal worker.

He glanced at the two envelopes and muttered just loud enough for me to hear, �$7.80.� I handed over a $20 bill while he affixed the postage paid sticker for $3.65 on each envelope. I watched him place each envelope in a stuffed bag full of other red, white and blue priority envelopes, got my change and then walked out of the post office.

It was such a simple act for something that has seemed so complicated. I may have waited 20 minutes in line, but it took me nearly 6 months to get to the point where I could take some action.

Those envelopes were both going to the same city and same zip code, but they had vastly different purposes. One was about tax forms and financial aid and the other held my heart on a piece of blue Pucca stationary ready for acceptance or rejection.

I didn�t feel nervous then. I can�t say the same right now. I�m terrified of him opening up the envelope to find another semi-thick manila envelope. Hopefully, he�ll look at the articles I sent him at his request and the note of apology for lagging so long that I attached. Maybe he�ll even completely miss the smaller blue envelope.

I can�t take anything back now, and I don�t want to. Still� I�m scared and yet proud of myself at the same time.

Priority mail takes 2-3 days to reach it�s destination.

Throughout this last week or so, I feel like I�ve had a council of advisors who have been there to help me figure out what I want to and gently nudge me toward actually doing it. Rose even offered to go to the post office with me. Here�s a small sampling of some of the reactions and comments. I love my friends.

Chispa: Just tell him already. It�s not like he doesn�t like you. That�s not the question.

Rose: girl, you all practically hooked up the other night.

Eligio: yes, he likes you!

Tony: I hope he wants you. He better, you�re cute and have a nice head on your shoulders... seriously, he better not turn you down.

Cheryl: wow, you�re brave! You�re my hero!

Lori: no offense, but you�re crazy, Pucca.

Adrian: how come you never like someone who lives within a 500 mile radius?

Me siento: mariposas en mi tummy!
Escuchando: the smiths' strangeways here we come

M�s reciente:
Searches - 09.16.05
the big move - 07.29.05
mother and daughter: a comparative analysis - 07.28.05
jardineros y dom�sticas - 07.27.05
tough question - 07.25.05

antes // despu�s