I wonder what it is about me that makes other people like me, or even just put up with me. I thought I knew what it was, but it's not quite so clear. I know that I'm far from being the perfect friend, sister, daughter, etc. I'm moody, catty, assuming, and a host of other things. I'm a smartass too... my mouth gets me in trouble way too often.

This is a big change from when I was a kid. As a kid, my brother Danny was the one who always spoke to much and said the wrong things at the wrong times. He got in trouble every other week for talking back to my parents. Talking back and being a smartass was a big taboo back then. Now, my parents are really lax about it, I'm not sure why. Adrian and Lori get away with a lot more. Maybe my parents just gave up with their sarcastic and rude kids (we're not like that all the time!).

So, back to Danny. I hated him for getting us into more trouble with his mouth. He just didn't know when to shutup. While my dad lectured us, I just shut my mouth and took whatever he said as fact, even if I didn't agree. Ending his tirade against us as quick as possible was all I wanted to see.

Has Danny changed? Well, not really. Have I? A lot. I don't talk back much to my parents, but I say a lot of shit I shouldn't to friends and other folks. In meetings I have to come up with some one liner or other to make everyone laugh. Do I want attention? Yeah... I have classic middle child syndrome. I crave attention. Danny, Adrian and Lori were (are!) always getting into some kind of trouble or other, but I was the good kid. Good grades, good manners, clean room.

Sigh. I told Rose to remind me to stop being such a smartass and to think before I speak more often. I cross that line between being funny and being a disruptive smartass too often. I don't need the trouble it causes me.

Me siento: tired
Escuchando: nada

M�s reciente:
Searches - 09.16.05
the big move - 07.29.05
mother and daughter: a comparative analysis - 07.28.05
jardineros y dom�sticas - 07.27.05
tough question - 07.25.05

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